WHY TED IS A BETTER PARENT
Happy Fourth of July, you guys! We spent the day with Ted's dad and stepmother in the middle of nowhere in New Jersey. I know, I hate New Jersey too, but it's where their house happens to be; they can't help it.
Anyway, there's a big backyard and a slip-and-slide for the kids. I have never been on a slip-and-slide. In fact, I'm pretty sure I was an adult before I even saw one. This is a big shock to people who grew up the country (Ted) who apparently grew up slipping and sliding all over the fucking place. I still don't really get what it is and fail to see the charm.
But Ted's parents have no pool (I keep telling them to get rid of the tennis court because they all suck at tennis and put in a pool for me. This campaign has been going strong for 9 years and has, so far, been completely unsuccessful) and it was hot. So Ted got busy setting up the slip-and-slide for the kids:
Meanwhile, I was
helping Ted
playing with the kids
hanging out with the family
sitting in a chair and sulking:
The bandage on my arm is not evidence of an attempt to off myself; it's covering a new tattoo. Which fucking hurts. I got it last night and while I have several others, this one is way more of a big deal, all colors and bigger and it took what seemed like FOREVER to do (which also hurt like a mofo). It's awesome. But it was kind of sore and I was super cranky and just generally unpleasant company.
So after watching the kids have an amazing time on the stupid slip-and-slide:
I went to take a nap. Why is it that a nap can fix 99% of all problems? I don't know, but when I woke up I was almost bearable to be around. We gave the kids a giant pack of sparklers to set off, and then it was time to go home.
So who would you vote for in a Better Parent contest: A) The tattooed slacker mom in a bad mood who took a two hour nap or B) The cheerful dad who set up a slip-and-slide and played with the kids all afternoon? You know what, never mind. I'll gracefully concede today to Ted. Tomorrow, after all, is another day :)
XOXOXO
ABC
