I mean, I love you guys, I really do. But this blog, amazingly successful as it is, doesn't really bring in the Benjamins. And we Tenthoffs gotz to get the money from somewhere. My kids aren't going to pay for their own matching outfits from CrewCuts, are they? No. They're not. And sadly, the bank that holds our mortgage doesn't accept sexual favors in lieu of actual payments. And Mercy the Amazing Nanny likes to be paid for the privilege of raising my kids, oddly enough.
Now, I'm not saying my salary pays all the bills or anything. I mean, I'm not a fucking Republican, for Christssake! I work for a non-profit, like a human, with a soul. But I still have to bring home SOME bacon to keep this show on the road, ya know what I mean?
Soooooo, hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work I go, Monday through Friday, and I'm lucky that I have an awesome job at Consumer Reports. Here's what I did there all week while you assholes were eating bon bons, watching soap operas, and reading my awesome blog:
That's right. I'm an internet star (right alongside T-Dawg). And I didn't even have to take my clothes off. For this one. I kid. Not really. Then I spent some time up at our Auto Test Center and this happened:
Is that shit fucked up or what?!?! $100,000+ for car that barely makes it off the test track before it croaks? Of course we had to make a video about it. Good times! Never a dull moment at the old 9 to 5! I need a drink. Or ten. TGImotherfuckingF. Have a kick-ass weekend!
XOXOXO
ABC
Now, I'm not saying my salary pays all the bills or anything. I mean, I'm not a fucking Republican, for Christssake! I work for a non-profit, like a human, with a soul. But I still have to bring home SOME bacon to keep this show on the road, ya know what I mean?
Soooooo, hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work I go, Monday through Friday, and I'm lucky that I have an awesome job at Consumer Reports. Here's what I did there all week while you assholes were eating bon bons, watching soap operas, and reading my awesome blog:
That's right. I'm an internet star (right alongside T-Dawg). And I didn't even have to take my clothes off. For this one. I kid. Not really. Then I spent some time up at our Auto Test Center and this happened:
Is that shit fucked up or what?!?! $100,000+ for car that barely makes it off the test track before it croaks? Of course we had to make a video about it. Good times! Never a dull moment at the old 9 to 5! I need a drink. Or ten. TGImotherfuckingF. Have a kick-ass weekend!
XOXOXO
ABC